It’s almost been 12 years since I fell in love with you...
When I first met you all I could think was ‘what a cute guy’...
The second time I saw you I was head over heels for you...
Soon after you broke my heart...
But we both held on to each other by a thread called ‘friendship’...
Once strangers we became best friends...
We parted ways after three years, embarking on another journey of life...
But I could not truly move on...
I saw you in every face...
I imagined being with you wherever I went...
I always thought what would you think?
What if you don’t like the new me?
What if you thought I was not good enough anymore?
My mind would subconsciously compare others with you...
Try to find reason to not like someone...
To push someone away...
I succeeded because you are that important to me...
I still dream of you sometimes...
I want to talk to you sometimes...
There’s so many things I want to tell you, share with you...
I pull up your number in my phone...
But my fingers turns numb...
The emotional trauma is too much to bear...
I promise myself no more pain..
But come next day and I am back to where it all began...
I wish love wasn’t this hard...
I wish you could love me the way I do...
I wish I could love someone else the way I love you...
Not because I want to move on, but because I want to end the suffering...
I hope you stay happy always...
I hope I find my happy place...
-Rashee Khemka
