Mayuri’s dead mother stood before her. She
ruffled her daughter’s hair, placed a white pearl in her palm and whispered, “This
will bring you luck, dear. Take care.” And then she disappeared, and Mayuri
woke up from her dream. Her mind was numb. She threw off her blanket. A white
pearl rolled onto the floor.
very sad.. and haunting little tail Ritesh.. Maybe my mom will come back to visit me when it's her time to leave this world..
ReplyDeleteHey Crystal, who knows your mom may outlive you. Prayers for her long health. And, of course, those who die can come back to us :)
DeleteYou know you rock at this genre of writing. I haven't read anyone as good as you.
ReplyDeleteThis Saru is the most encouraging comment I have ever received...and coming from you,it's a big thing. Thanks much. I promise i won't let you down in the future :)
Deletewonderful....
ReplyDeleteShukriya Neha ji :P
DeleteThat was a good one. :)
ReplyDeletehi vinay..thanks much :)
DeleteGood attempt. Make it tighter. //If the pearl was in her palm, why does it fall off when she throws away the blanket? The story doesn't ask a reader to make a jump in imagination.//
ReplyDeleteBut I'll admit, you are good at shorty stuff.
Hi. I had that option. That she would wake up and find a pearl in her palm. But i wanted it to be a tad subtle. I prefer to keep my endings open to multiple interpretations.
DeleteAnyway, thanks for your good suggestion. :)
Your innate ability to write short stories make your work highly intriguing. I'm your fan sir! Superb..
ReplyDeleteHehe, I am your fan too for the effortless humor & realism u put into your stories. :))
ReplyDeleteYou can do much better. First time hopping here, looking forward to read some of your other posts.
ReplyDeleteThanks Es Chris. :)
ReplyDeleteThat was a good one...
ReplyDeleteDo visit my blog! Would love to see you by! *cheers*
hi Kappu....thanks much :)
ReplyDelete